Do you ever feel like you’re not enough? That what you do isn’t enough, or even who you are? It isn’t difficult to find a reason to be down and out in today’s world. You’ll always let someone down, eventually. You can’t live up to their expectations. You aren’t perfect. No one is. But what about when you’re doing your best? Well, for some people, you never will be enough, whether you give your best effort or not.
It hurts, doesn’t it? Letting others down or feeling like you can’t please someone important to you. You want to make them proud, but sometimes you’re just out of practice, out of time, or out of resources. You don’t have enough strength, stamina, or skills. You can’t always offer mental, emotional, physical, or spiritual support. Sometimes you make the wrong move, make a poor decision, a bad judgment call. And the weight of that lack in you is crushing.
Guess what? You’re human. You have faults. You aren’t the end all to be all. You aren’t the hero every time. You aren’t the savior. So why keep trying to be? That’s a lot of pressure to put on yourself. It’s a lot of responsibility to take on. It’s taxing, too. You aren’t created to shoulder the weight of the world, especially for extended periods of time. It’s not your job to be perfect.
Obviously, I’m not saying go out and be a no-good dead beat. I’m not saying don’t do your best, give your all, and be who God made you to be. But I am saying you need grace. Just because you know you aren’t perfect doesn’t mean you can’t continue to strive to get better. There’s always room for improvement, something to work on. You’re going to fail at something at some point in your life. In fact, I can pretty much guarantee you’re going to fail…a lot. And, sometimes, that means you fail the people who mean the most to you.
Knowing this, you can either choose to wallow in your failure or you can use it as a stepping stone to success, a building block. You know that old saying “learn from your mistakes.” It can be a stinging truth, but…I think it can also be a bit of a relief. To know that it’s okay to mess up every now and then? That’s a whole lot easier than stressing out and waiting for the other shoe to drop. You can turn your inevitable disasters around and use them for good. And to do that, you need grace.
Grace is the tool that allows you to accept your failures, learn from your mistakes, and move on. Grace says, “It’s okay to be broken, to fall short.” God says He holds us in His hands. He extends mercy when we fall. He bestows grace on our lives because He loves us. We all fall down. We have all fallen short of the glory of God. We’re sinners from our mothers’ wombs. But grace says we don’t have to stay stained forever. It’s not a pass to be a shlum, but it is a salve for the wounds of your failures.
So, know when you don’t live up to the expectations of those around you, it’s okay. Take a breath and patch up any relationships if the situation calls for it. Grace walks hand in hand with another force: forgiveness. Not only do we need to accept the gift of grace when we fail, but we need to remember to extend it to those who fail us.
Forgiveness goes against our nature. We want to be angry, take offense, and blame everyone and everything around us. We feel justified in our indignation, wronged by the people in our lives, and vindictive because of it. Forgiveness is hard. And asking for forgiveness when you were the one at fault is sometimes even harder. It wounds our pride and requires humility. I believe forgiveness is a process and that sometimes it takes time to forgive. (And, forgiveness certainly isn’t an excuse to continue to subjugate yourself to a poisonous situation, either!) But, truthfully, if you can harness the “weapon” of forgiveness, you will thrive as you never have before.
Lean on Christ to be the only one who is always there, always dependable, always right, always kind, always strong, and always loving. He is the only one who will never let you down. He is the only one who can every complete you. Not your spouse, or your children, or your teachers, or your siblings, or your boss, or your best friend. No one can take His place and no one can fulfill you except Christ Jesus. He will never bring you harm. He may correct you, rebuke you, or prune you—which can, and often does hurt—but He will never harm you. When others let you down or hurt you—and they will, whether intentionally or inadvertently—extend the same grace to them that your Father extends to you.
Since the Fall of Man, we’ve lived in a broken world. The breathtaking beauty of this world, so full of untold wonders and magnificent sights is becoming dimmer and dimmer every day. And we can’t fix that. Only God can. We live in a foul place, riddled with corruption. You are corrupted. The people around you are corrupted. It’s inescapable. You will be hurt and you will hurt others. The question is, how will you handle those hurts?
When is the last time someone said or did something that cut you down? Did they do it on purpose? If not, why did their words or actions hurt so much? What was it that struck you to your core? Was it some random bully at school or someone much closer? Why is that person so important to you? How can you show them grace and seek healing for yourself and your relationship? What are ways you can make this a regular part of your life and minimize the hurts before they begin? Start a discussion below!!
Love always,
Coralie
Broken Together by Casting Crowns